“The Feature” highlights the works of Muslim women who are either doing amazing things in their communities, running successful businesses or organising events. Today, we feature a sex dialogue with Amirah Zaky, a Muslim Sex Educator and Body Positivity Advocate.
“To say that talking about sex is immoral is like saying that talking about breathing is Immoral” – Amirah Zaky
When Muslim women want guidance on sexual intimacy and pleasure, to where do they turn? What doesn’t seem obvious is that we only need to look inwards to find a rich sexual tradition which has always been a part of our Islamic heritage. Contrary to negative beliefs surrounding sex and sexuality in the Muslim world, there is a new sexual revolution going on amongst Muslims in the 21st century. Muslim sex educators are helping Muslim women take back their sexual powers, premised on the fact that orgasm and sensuality are God’s will for us.
To dig deeper into how Muslim sex educators are helping to dismantle faulty narratives around sex, we came across Amirah Zaky, an advocate of body positivity and God-conscious sexuality.
Amirah Zaky is the founder of Confident Marital Sex, an online course comprising of video lessons and resources with a private support group and community. Amirah went from having a fear of sex and experiencing vaginismus (inability to have intercourse) to now having comfortable, pleasurable and orgasmic sex with her husband. Her mission is to help women overcome or prevent vaginismus so that they can confidently have pleasurable sexual intercourse in their marriages.
To learn more about Amirah Zaky’s work as a Sex Educator, TMWT had a chat with her and here’s what she had to say:
TMWT: Growing up, what was sex education like for you and how did that evolve over the years?
Amirah Zaky: Growing up, sex education was pretty much non-existent in my household. We didn’t talk about sex. My mum briefly told me about my periods but that was it. I had some basic sex education in secondary school but it mainly focused on trying to prevent teenage girls from getting pregnant. My sex education evolved over the years due to my own experience. I had a fear of having sex for the first time on my wedding night. I got this fear due to stories I heard from other teenage girls that “losing your virginity” is painful. This fear caused me to not be able to have intercourse on my wedding night. I later learned that I had the condition vaginismus which causes painful and impossible sexual penetration.
TMWT: We’re aware that you’re very passionate about sex education and you’re doing a great job helping Muslim women reclaim their sexual power. What would you say motivated you towards this path?
Amirah Zaky: What motivated me is knowing that there are many myths about sex and these myths need to be dismantled. I also know there are many toxic negative beliefs about sex within the Muslim community and these beliefs actually go against the nature of Islam so this motivated me to put things right.
TMWT: Do you think Muslim women are challenged when it comes to appreciating the importance of sensual gratification and healthy sexual conversations? What do you think could be the cause of this?
Amirah Zaky: Yes absolutely. I think the cause of this is lack of proper sex education when growing up and also that sex is taboo in many Muslim communities.
TMWT: Can you share some of the successes you’ve experienced as a Sex Educator? Has your work changed the lives of your students?
Amirah Zaky: I have successfully helped many women overcome vaginismus. This means sexual intercourse is no longer painful or impossible for them. This means that these women can have full sexual intercourse with their husbands and it is completely comfortable and pleasurable. Many women have now been able to get pregnant after overcoming their vaginismus. My biggest success at the moment is openly talking about sex on my social media platform. I am very engaged with my audience and this is giving my valuable insight and feedback about the content I want to include in my book In shaa Allah.
TMWT: What are some of the challenges you’ve faced in your work?
Amirah Zaky: I’ve had some backlash from some people saying that what I’m doing is haram. But alhamdulillah, the overwhelming majority of people who follow me are very supportive and encouraging of the work I do.
TMWT: What is your advice for any young woman who wants to follow your path?
Amirah Zaky: I highly recommend that all women empower themselves with proper sex education.
Follow Amirah Zaky on Instagram
We all Need to Talk About Sex: Dismantling the Culture of Purity and Shame • The Muslim Women Times
TMWT is an online media platform spotlighting the stories of Muslim women of the past and present. We aim to be one of the most authoritative and informative guides to what is happening in the world of Muslim women. We hope to cover key issues, spark debates, progressive ideas and provocative topics to get the Muslim world talking. We want to set agendas and explore ideas to improve the lives and wellbeing of Muslim Women.